Monday, April 30, 2012

beginning, end, repeat

spring always means my birthday and our biggest local festival (which, for this part of Louisiana, is saying a lot- we have a festival for every occasion). it also, this year, means rebirth in many arenas for me, and like the pop of fresh cherry tree buds-these changes are surprising, somewhat painful, and very beautiful. I think Neruda said there was always a little violence in the spring- and I want to do to you what spring does to the cherry trees was always one of my favorite lines of poetry, so the metaphor fits. awakening is not always comfortable but it can be lovely if we allow the changes to flow. a lot like pottery, scrapping an old pattern and beginning anew at the wheel. remaining fluid, molten, not taking anyone else's journey too personally and just aiming for compassionate thinking all of the time. then the rebuilding and the renovation begin. I got extremely lucky in one aspect of this- my new, gorgeous, unbelievable Craftsman bungalow fell into my lap without one single project attached to it. So I moved in easily and smoothly. There aren't many sensations as satisfying or serenity inducing as falling in love with a space that you own. It's surreal- I look around and wonder how in the world I got so lucky. There is a screened in porch that I've already laid my yoga mat down on, beautiful, simple design through and through, scraped hickory floors, lots of windows and peace on top of peace. I am cooking my first big meal in my kitchen tonight- I owe someone dinner- and the fresh herbs growing on the ledge and my amazing new stove are just beckoning to me as the work day slowly ambles by. Patience is another new virtue that I'm trying on for size! The house and my heart are brimming with fresh new memories from the past couple of weeks and the realization that all is well, everything can be made whole again, there is solace in friends, family, and sunshine, and that a garden pretty much cures anything. I guess I'm rowing away from the shore and taking another gamble on what the future holds. But the absolute cherry on top is knowing that I was fortunate to come to this crossroads- and that I wouldn't change a moment of what I've endured to be in this brave new world. It was real, it was life altering, and it was so very beautiful while it lasted. Love and delicacies- creating either of these in this madly spinning world is a talent never wasted. I'm just going to roll up my sleeves, pop open that last bottle of Evolution wine, and play the music in the kitchen as loudly as it will go, as I cook and plot and expand the master plan. Comme la vie est belle.

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